Posts Tagged ‘word of God’

Watch & Pray Always That Ye Enter Not Into Temptation

April 8th, 2010

“Watch and pray,” Jesus said, “that ye enter not into temptation.” (Matt. 26:41.)

I have felt time and again that one of things that leads me into temptation is not being focused. Sometimes when I sleep in I feel groggy upon waking. In this morning haze I often let my mind wander where it wants. If I’ve had a dream that’s sexual in nature my mind can be drawn to that in its foggy state. Not so good.

I’ve grown up learning about morning and evening prayers. In the case I described above, morning prayers are definitely a start to me gaining focus in my morning.

I learned a while ago just how powerful it is to “pray always.” Now of course that doesn’t mean that I’m on my knees all day long, but it DOES mean that I watch all day and pay attention to where my eyes are going, what I’m thinking, what feelings I’m having and what I’m saying and doing…which are an outcome of the first three.

At first it was really hard for me to recognize when I was in a state ripe for indulging. I had just acted so many times on the thoughts & urges that the window of awareness was small, but it’s getting easier. After many prayers and some practice it is becoming easier.

Sometimes it’s hard for me to remained focused on any given plan of attack. I think at times I make it too difficult, too many steps. So, I’m going to recommit myself again and try a simpler plan…3 weeks is the ultimate goal, but I haven’t gone 1 week in a while without giving in to some temptation or another, so I’ll start there.

The things I’m going to do daily

  1. Spirit:
    1. Study the Word
    2. Prayer
  2. Mind:
    1. Practice Face it. Replace it. Connect.
    2. Journaling
  3. Body
    1. Exercise
    2. Good Sleep
  4. Others
    1. Serve
    2. Work

Now that I write it out, it again seems like too much…is it? Eh, I’ll give er a shot. These are all very powerful things in my life. I’m also going to track how well I keep my eyes focused on good things, my thoughts on truth, my hands where they should be :) , and my actions in check.

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    A Slight Change of Focus

    October 15th, 2009

    Over the last couple days I’ve felt a lack of confidence in the efforts I’ve been making to rid my life of pornography, addiction and lust. I guess with the realization that only Christ has power to save I mistakenly thought that I no longer needed to take heed when temptations would come. For a small moment I was thinking that he’d magically swoop in and save me IN my sins.

    However, yesterday as I knelt in prayer and this morning as I was feasting upon the words of Christ I felt a gentle impression that my works ARE important, but that I just needed to remember why I was doing them. My efforts in learning about my addiction and in building skills necessary to face it are not so that I can fill some divine quota that would qualify myself for deliverance from my struggles.

    Rather, my efforts are simply my meager offerings that I place on the altar of sacrifice before my Father in Heaven. I then must plead to him for acceptance of the offering that I know is not enough to save myself. Lastly, I must ask with all sincerity for the blood of his Son to cleanse and free me.

    So, I again am confident that my efforts to change are not in vain. I simply must always keep the focus on my Savior and his ability, his might, his strength, for I of myself am weak. I of myself have been addicted to lust for almost 20 years. The only break in that addiction came when I began to search the words of Christ to find him and then gave myself to service.

    It just hit me now as I’m writing this that I may just be arriving someday soon at the first step of the Alcoholics Anonymous 12 step program:

    I admit that I, of myself, am powerless to overcome my addictions and that my life has become unmanageable.

    I dearly seek the submission necessary to again leave behind my world of addiction and let the Light of Christ fill my heart, magnify my abilities and give me infinite love with which to serve my brothers and sisters here on this earth. Life is too short to spend it in any other way!

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    Foundations in Christ

    October 14th, 2009
    The Master Healer

    The Master Healer

    Pornography is a vicious master. Even when it’s not around I can recall images in my mind and fantasy is a powerful alternative to porn. I have been striving so hard to find a way out of my chains. I have been “working my program” and been very diligent at it, not perfect, but diligent.

    I keep having days I’d best describe as cloudy. Though there are bright rays of hope and peace scattered throughout to keep me moving forward I have also felt dazed by not knowing when I will be free. I struggle because I think that “if I just work the program I’ll be better.”

    Recently as I read a book by a man who struggled with porn and masturbation addiction that overcame it, he cited all the efforts he poured out to try and rid his life of the prison of pornography. He struggled for 30 years and felt hopeless though he kept trying.

    One day it hit him…the answer wasn’t in “trying to be like Jesus” alone, it was in giving his life over to Jesus! Jesus, he rightly stated, is the only name by which mankind can be saved. Thus, any efforts, no matter how great they are insufficient to deliver us from the slavery and sin of addiction.

    Only in Christ as our foundation can we be set free. I have felt that many times, but so often forgotten it as I print out a checklist of all the things that he asked us to do and begin doing them. I get lost in the details and find myself right back in the same trap.

    So, here, I’m admitting that I don’t fully understand the great doctrine of Christ, the kind that saves, but I want to and commit now to seek him out until I know him.

    Just before my religious missionary service I gave myself to a study of the word of God. It wasn’t in the act itself, but it was in what I was looking for that a temporary deliverance came to me while I served. Sober for a year. Alive in Christ. A Mighty Change of Heart. That’s what I want again. Christ, take my heart and make it pure!

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